For years, The Bachelor spoilers guru Reality Steve has been a big part of the show itself, and the bane of its existence.
His prolific ability to drop The Bachelor and The Bachelorette spoilers, year after year, has made the blogger quasi-famous.
Demi Burnett is now revealing that, behind the scenes, this made contestants like her more than a little afraid of him.
But still, no one saw this coming.
She revealed that he once tricked her into a phone call where he shared a “graphic sex dream” he’d had about her.
Steve issued a public apology, which was the right thing to do. But we have to start at the beginning for this.
As we said earlier, Reality Steve, a blog run by Steve Carbone, has been around for a long time.
Seriously, the blog began in 2003. And while he’s made a living from it, not all of that history has been good.
In older posts on the blog, Steve’s commentary was at times alarmingly misogynistic.
This came up on this week’s episode of the podcast, Chatty Broads.
Bekah Martinez (above) and Jess Ambrose, the hosts, brought up a recent reddit thread about Steve’s old posts.
“What he’s done publicly that has been published on his website and his Twitter, etcetera,” Bekah noted.
She wrote that many of his posts “are extremely problematic and show an extreme internalized bias.”
This is a bias, she described on the podcast, “towards just women as a whole that I think is really disturbing.”
Steve saw the discourse about him.
Some was earnest, and some was frankly backlash for his critiques of Chris Harrison from the latter’s rabid, racist fans.
He took to Twitter to vow that he has changed.
“Wanted to address my past writings that were brought to light again today on a podcast,” Steve wrote this week.
“There is/was no excuse for them,” he affirmed.
“I’m embarrassed I thought that way.”
Steve continued: “I’m embarrassed I wrote it, and ever since, I’ve done whatever I could to change that line of thinking.”
People do change, and it is certainly true that his official blogging and coverage’s tone has changed considerably.
However, Bachelor Nation fan favorite Demi Burnett felt that Steve had not really changed, deep down.
Why? Because of an inappropriate conversation that he had with her last year.
“No Steve! You haven’t changed,” Demi wrote as she quote-tweeted Steve’s apology.
What followed was a series of screenshots of Demi’s Notes App draft, calling out Steve.
“I wasn’t going to ever say anything out of fear of criticism,” Demi confessed.
“But after being made aware of this tweet and your history of treating women, I had to say something,” Demi wrote.
She observed that Steve has a history of “spreading gossip that was false and damaging” to the Bachelor Fam.
“This has resulted in a sort of power you have over us,” Demi expressed.
“Out of fear of you talking about us,” Demi explained.
“Many cast members in Bachelor Nation decide to have a professional relationship with you,” she noted.
“And,” Demi continued, “be friendly hoping that might prevent you from gossiping about us.”
“You outed me as bisexual before I had a chance to tell my family,” Demi said, taking this whole thing up 12 notches.
“I figured f–k it!” she expressed.
“I might as well respond to you,” she recalled reasoning, “to avoid you gossiping about my personal life any longer.”
This led to the time in August of 2020, when Steve contacted Demi about something “bizarre.”
Steve told her at the time it was something that he “couldn’t put into writing.”
“Fearing it was some gossip you heard about me,” Demi shared, “I agreed to talk on the phone with you.”
“Then you proceeded to tell me about a graphic sex dream you had of me,” Demi accused.
“I felt uncomfortable,” she shared, “and wasn’t sure how I should handle your unwanted and unprompted sexual advance.”
“So, I laughed and tried to get off the phone with you as quickly as possible,” Demi recalled.
“I was always friendly to you,” Demi noted.
“And,” she added, “you took my friendliness as an excuse to trick me into listening to your sexual fantasies about me.”
Demi expressed: “It felt gross. I don’t think I deserved to have you make me feel this way.”
To top it all off, Demi shared a screenshot of their text exchange that followed the phone call.
Sharing a sex dream with the dream’s subject can be creepy and invasive unless you know that you have a good rapport.
Sharing a sex dream with someone who fears the consequences that might come if you are unhappy with them is an abuse of power.
“I had no idea at the time that conversation made you feel that way,” Steve replied in a public tweet.
“I am apologizing now knowing how uncomfortable I made you feel,” he wrote.
Steve added: “I crossed boundaries I didn’t think at the time I was crossing.”
“I did not know this until today,” Steve claimed.
“So for that,” he wrote, “I hope you can accept my apology.”
“I’m not blaming her at all,” Steve wrote in a follow-up tweet.
“I did not know about how she felt until less than an hour ago,” Steve explained.
“So once I found out she felt this way,” he noted, “I apologized to her both personally and here on Twitter.”
To his credit, hey, at least he didn’t deny it. That would have made this worse.
But on the other hand … if he didn’t know that he was crossing a boundary, why do this over the phone?
Texts and DMs are automatically just there to view. Very few people record their calls, and it’s illegal in some places.
It seems like, on some level, Steve must have known that he was crossing some boundary, right?